Nothing lasts forever.
On this, day 9 of Lockdown, my head may tell me that I am happy and comfortable and intend staying locked forever, but I know it does not work like that. This is real, not fantasy. I do indeed have a stainless steel device locked to my undercarriage and it has indeed been there for the last 9 days and I have indeed frozen the keys in a bottle of water kept in the freezer.
I am not writing this to fuel some unreal fantasy. I am writing it to document how it feels, how it really feels. I am hoping those thinking of submitting to chastity will find something useful herein. I am hoping it will help banish some of the fantasists’ claims. I am hoping that perhaps others will eventually feel able to share their real stories, not made up nonsense and male bravado. You will find no bravado here. Just honesty.
And yes, honestly, sometimes it hurts. Today has not been the best day. I can find no pattern or reason as to why some days are better than others. That just seems to be the way things are.
But I am nothing if not determined. I am nothing if not devoted to Mistress and to her pleasure in all things. And if a little suffering is required, so what? It is worth it. To know that I am securely locked away, unable to touch myself or to pleasure myself without permission, for which I dare not ask, surely that means something? Surely I am demonstrating some kind of willing devotion? And surely, as it is entirely voluntary, that shows a certain level of real devotion and submission? I have not been forced into this. I do it because I hope so much it is pleasing to Mistress.
And so how does it feel really? It feels wonderful. It becomes a part of you. It is a choice and it may hurt from time to time, things may pinch, but I am genuinely determined to carry on for as long as I can, just so long as I do not injure myself seriously in the process.
So this is real chastity. This is a new life I have decided on. In truth, I decided on it long ago. To be locked like this does not happen overnight. It has taken a year to get to this stage. That doesn’t mean I am any less devoted. Quite the opposite. That I have continued trying for so long is a message all of its own.
I look forward to the coming hours and days and weeks. I look forward to be able to demonstrate my devotion to Mistress every single hour of every single day. And how many people get to be that lucky?