Is this it?
Have I spent three weeks locked in chastity, this now the fourth week, only to founder and fail? Is this why I did it?
I knew failure was coming. It was always on the cards.
And yet keys remain frozen. I remain locked. I do not know if this is desirable or preferential to anyone. Sometimes, this self locking male chastity is a lonely business.
But I haven’t failed yet. Not this time anyway.
There are times when one wonders, when one doubts. This, perhaps, is such a time. I am only human. I can only do so much. The spirit may be strong, but the flesh is weak, as they say.
If anyone ever had any doubt that this was real, please banish it now. I am not a fantasy figure, this locking is not pretend. These rollercoaster emotions I feel myself clinging to are real emotions, not made up design fake story-line plot devices.
I can assure, however, that I remain devoted. I remain locked. I remain in submission to the most wonderful Mistress in the world. I know we all claim that. It is just that my claim happens to be true.
I know this runs the risk of alienating others, but it need not do so. We are all right in our own way. Our respective dominants are, to each of us, the most supreme figure there is. That is simply how this works. The important thing is that if we did not believe it, this world as we have come to know it would not exist.
I just wanted to make it clear. Mistress is the best.
I am not her slave, I am not her property. I am my own individual and live my own life. She is her own individual and she lives her own life. The myth of dichromy does not live here. Not all is black and white.
But I nevertheless am devoted. There is no contradiction here. I am utterly and absolutely devoted. Am I making it clear? This is not a fantasy world. This is real, all real.
So, week 4 of chastity. There has been one break so far. Just one break in 24/7 locking. Do I complain? Do I wish Mistress would allow me release? In this world of chastity and devotion and submission, then no. I do not desire release. I may require it at some point for health and hygiene reasons, but I will never ever ask unless in dire extremis. And dire extremis is not now. I subsume myself to the wishes of Mistress. I would not have it any other way. And I hope and believe she feels the same.